Bloom & the Gang: Stacey’s Story
Gardening to Feel Good group attendee Stacey tellus about what she got from the groups and how nature and gardening has helped her this year.
Getting Involved
I first found out about Bloom from my sister, who sent me some information about it. It was probably about a year ago, at a time when I was struggling with depression and anxiety. I thought, oh this sounds great – but I could never do that. It felt like I’d never be in a place to go to groups or anything.
Then Bloom opened the shop on Chesterfield Road, which is quite near where I live. I was feeling in a better place. I looked at the Gardening to Feel Good groups and, it must have been on a day I was feeling particularly brave, because I did the self-referral.
Becoming Green-fingered
I’ve always known that being outside and in nature has been helpful to me. In the last year or so I’ve definitely had a bit more interest in gardening. We bought a house and have a little garden and I got more interested in it. I thought it would have felt like a very big step to go to a group – but it felt like a step I’d be more comfortable with because it was outside, it was nature based. I think I felt it would suit me quite well if I was able to do it.
At the first session I was definitely very anxious. I knew in my head it was a very big step for me, and that if I made that step, it would mean quite a lot for me. But as soon as I got there, I released that weight – it felt so comfortable, and everyone was so lovely. I definitely eased into it very quickly.
I loved getting my hands in, getting them muddy. Planting, sowing seeds, the weeding. I’ve always found it takes your mind off of things. You’re focusing on your little bit of whatever you’re doing, and you can have a nice calm chat with whoever’s around. I think the allotment itself is a very calming place. Just being there, sitting and having a cup of tea – it’s a nice atmosphere.
It spurred me on to do more seed sowing and seed collecting, which I’ve never done before. Weeding seemed a lot more fun at the allotment than in my garden! Definitely trying different flowers as well, there were so many lovely flowers.
A comforting community
I think Bloom’s sessions have given me confidence in going out again, doing something on my own, for myself. When I’m in a bad place, just leaving the house on my own can be exceptionally difficult. So Bloom’s definitely helped me get over that hurdle – I know I can do it, no matter how I have been feeling. If I’ve booked a Gather and Grow session I know when I go there it’s going to be lovely people, and it’s going to be something that will make me feel better, like a safe space.
I got into the comfort of the Gardening to Feel Good groups, knowing who was going to be there and exactly what it would be like – so I thought if I booked onto another sort of session after that it would keep me going.
With depression, it’s very easy to get stuck and it’s difficult to think about the future. But a big part of gardening is that you’re doing something in the moment that’s for the future. If you’re sowing some seeds, then the final flowers are going to take weeks and weeks to bloom, but watching it grow and have hope for their future. That’s something that I’ve tried to take a bit more into life; that you can look forward to the future and see what grows from it.
Being with other women at the Bloom sessions felt very much like a safe space. We didn’t necessarily all talk in depth about issues and problems we had, but we all sort of knew that we’d had unique and different struggles. We all needed to be there at that time for the sort of peace you get from the groups and the gardens. So it made it easy to chat.
It’s comforting to know there are other women going through struggles and you wouldn’t necessarily know what they are – but knowing we were there for the same reason and getting through stuff together was nice.
Turning to nature
The last couple of years have made me realise that my depression isn’t going anywhere. Like, I’ll have ups and downs because I’ve struggled with it since I was 14, 15. It’s part of me and part of my life – so knowing how to deal with it and get through it is what’s most important. Having the tools to get me through the bad spells is what’s most important. Knowing I can turn to the outdoors, to nature and to gardening – and now knowing I have access to that through Bloom, which is a lovely tool to have.
I feel everyone needs something like Bloom. Especially if you don’t have access to a garden or a lot of green space and nature. It’s so important to have that, and flowers can bring everyone a bit of joy. Having access to flowers, to green spaces and friendly people with a good cup of tea can help everyone – so I definitely recommend it.
I obviously did it when I felt ready. So anyone who has found out about Bloom and isn’t sure, I think they should just go for it. Even if you just end up going for a couple of sessions, just meeting similar people, seeing the flowers and taking flowers home each week will brighten your week and definitely help.